< Go Back Don't let setbacks and difficulties put you right back where you started from. Posted: May 8, 2014 Making changes stick
Don't let setbacks and difficulties put you right back where you
started from.
How many times have
you started an exercise regime, or a diet, or just tried something new in your life
only to meet a setback and have everything fail and go back to the way you
were?
Don't worry -
you're not the only one! Setbacks, problems and difficulties occur all the
time; they are a natural part of life. It's
the way you deal with them that makes all the difference.
So what can you do?
As the problem itself
isn't going to change you'll have to change the way you respond to the problem.
Dealing with the setback correctly means
that not only will it cease to be a problem but you will also be filled with
the self-confidence and belief that will fuel your determination to achieve
what you set out to do.
When you are faced
with a setback your ability to deal with it will be greatly improved if you
move to a position of strength and the easiest way to do this is by asking
yourself positive, empowering questions. There is an unwritten rule that says 'If I you ask your mind a negative question you will get a negative answer'. So if after a setback you ask yourself
something like ' Why does this always happen to me, I never have any luck?' your mind will probably reply along the lines of ' Because you are useless and
good things don't happen to you!' Perhaps this sounds familiar?
However, if you ask
yourself a positive, empowering question such as 'What can I learn from this
setback for next time?' your mind will move into problem-solving
mode and start finding all the positives in the experience.
Once you are in problem-solving
mode there are several key positive actions you can take which will make sure
that you get the most out of any setback that does occur:
Acknowledge that the setback has happened. Don't hide from it. These things happen - so what?
Recognise that setbacks occur to everyone and that
you are not being singled out. It's
really not personal!
Treat the setback as a challenge to be overcome
rather than as an unsolvable issue or problem.
Work out what positive, empowering questions you
can ask yourself, and then ask them!
For example:
What is good about this situation?
How can I make the most of this situation?
What can I learn from this setback?
What are the facts about this problem?
How can I turn this into a successful outcome?
What might I do to go round or over this problem?
In the words of the song - 'accentuate the positive, eliminate the
negative'!
Over the next few
days jot down all the negative, demoralising thoughts you have each time you
are faced with a problem or setback. Then
work out for each one some positive, empowering questions that you could ask
yourself instead. Read these questions
frequently, internalise them and you'll be amazed at the constructive answers
and ideas your brain will give you with next time you hit a seemingly
'impossible' problem or 'insurmountable' setback.
